Episode 4.2
originally broadcast September 22, 1973
Written by Marylin Suzanne Miller and Monica Magowan-Johnson
Directed by Jay Sandrich
Storyline: Mary meets Steven at the market on Saturday and spends the afternoon playing snow games with him. Rhoda is instantly jealous! Back at the office on Monday, Ted tells everyone what he did over the weekend. Rhoda alerts Mary to the obvious fact that Steven is much younger than she. Mary finally asks Steven his age; he's twenty-five and she's thirty-three. They go on a few dates; Lou expresses concern that Mary is involved in an "autumn-spring affair". Mary and Rhoda go shopping for some "younger" attire for Mary at an eccentric clothing store. They attend a party at Steven's apartment and have a lousy time; Mary and Steven part ways for good.
Memorable Quotations/Exchanges:
MARY: Rhoda Morgenstern, this is Steven Linder.
RHODA: Hello, Steven. Forgive my foliage.
MARY: I'm babysitting for Rhoda's plant. She's going skiing this weekend.
STEVEN: Well, you picked a good time to go.
RHODA: Yeah, I thought I'd wait for winter.
MARY: I met him at the market this morning.
RHODA: Funny, yesterday I was there and they were all out of him.
RHODA: Mary, sometimes I think you live in a shampoo commercial.
MARY: What?
RHODA: Well, you know those girls in the commercials? They're always getting rid of their split ends and falling in love outdoors.
MARY: You flap your arms and...angels in the ssss.....snow.
RHODA: I'm gonna do that this weekend when I go skiing. Maybe I'd get mistaken for Allie McGraw. Terminal but cute.
RHODA: (to her potted plant) Don't have too much fun while I'm gone. If you get pregnant, I'm not paying for the pruning.
TED: Murray, how'sa boy?
MURRAY: You're Ted. Does it worry you that you're Ted?
TED: (putting his arm around Mary) Was your weekend as great as mine, Mary?
MARY: Yeah, Ted, it was a pretty nice weekend.
TED: Guess what I did on my weekend.
LOU: G'morning, everybody.
TED: C'mon, guess. I'll give you a hint. My weekend was SINsational.
MURRAY: Ted, we don't wanna hear about it! (he gets up and leaves)
MARY: What did you do this weekend, Mr. Grant?
LOU: Oh, my granddaughter's hamster died, and I had to go to the funeral.
TED: Don'tcha get it? SINsational?
LOU: I just hope they cry like that when I die.
TED: When do I get to tell what I did on my weekend?
MARY: (phone rings; to phone) Steven, hi. You remembered that I work here! Well, I can't really take the day off now, because I'm already IN the day. The earliest I could get off would be...(she looks up at Lou and he shakes his head) seven o'clock tonight. Okay, see you then. Alright, I promise I'll act like it's morning. Bye.
TED: Alright, alright, I'll tell you what I did on my weekend. I got consummated. (close shot of Mary with expression of complete disinterest)
LOU: Did ya take somethin' for it?
(Ted walks away, disgusted.)
RHODA: Mary, I hate this store. It's trying too hard. I like a store that's happy to just lie there and rip me off.
RHODA: (to sales clerk) What is the name of this store?
CLERK: Shot Down in Ecuador Junior.
RHODA: What?!
CLERK: SHOT DOWN...IN ECUADOR...JUNIOR.
RHODA: Mary, listen to this. (reading from small book off display case) "A friend is someone who's friendly. A friend is someone who's friendly. Even when it's raining. Even when it's nighttime. Even when it's snowing. Even when it isn't." Three fifty ($3.50).
LOU: I'm going to put this as gently as I can. You are ruining your life and driving a stake through the hearts of all those who love you.
MARY: What?!
LOU: Mary, you're young man...he's a young man.
MARY: Mister Grant!
LOU: That kid is nobody for a medium-aged girl like you!
TED: (surprised at this) Louuuuuu!
LOU: Not now, Ted! If it were anybody else...Rhoda, maybe...
MARY: (angry)You know, I am really, really...
TED: T.O.'d?
MARY: T.O.'d!
LOU: Butt out, Ted!
TED: I think it's time I said something here, Lou.
LOU: No it isn't, Ted!
TED: I'm sorry Lou, but I have to speak frankly. If Mary is involved in an autumn-spring affair, that's her business! Usually it's the man who's autumn, but what difference does it make?
MARY: Excuse me, but I find this REALLY none of your business!
LOU: Okay, it's none of my business.
TED: I agree with him, Mary. It's none of his business.
RHODA: Shhhhh! You hear that, Mary? You and I are a part of one of nature's most precious moments! A baby corn is being born into the world! Somewhere out there, an ear of corn is passing out cigars.
MARY: Hello. How are you?
GIRL AT PARTY: Why do you ask that now?
RHODA: I know exactly where I was twelve years ago. I was at a party like this, sitting on a couch like this, drinking wine from a paper cup like this. You've come a long way, baby.
BECK: We're gonna go downtown and goof on people.
RHODA: Goof on people?
BECK: Walk around, act weird, and hope that somebody notices.
RHODA: That's my life, kid.
Credits:
Associate Producer/Production Manager: Lionel A. Ephraim
Music composed and conducted by Pat Williams
Theme music "Love is All Around" written and sung by Sonny Curtis
Director of Photography: Paul Uhl
Assistant Producer: Michael Zinberg
Art Director: Lewis Hurst, Jr.
Film Editor: Douglas Hines
Assistant Director: John C. Chulay
Script Supervisor: Marjorie Mullen
Set Decorator: Joseph Rieth
Camera Coordinator: Don Bustany
Gaffer: Sam Ozment
Key Grip: Roy Kight
Property Master: Gene Cox
Makeup: Ben Nye, II
Hairstylist: Donna Cox
Sound Mixer: Cameron McCullough
Music Editor: Ed Norton Music Editing, Inc.
Production Assistant: Cheryl Blythe
Men's Costumes: Don McDonald
Women's Costumes: Leslie Hall
Wardrobe for Mary Tyler Moore furnished by Norman Todd
Script Consultants: James L. Brooks and Allan Burns
Comments: Has a few good laughs, including the scene where Ted insists on talking about his loss of virginity and a goofy scene where Mary tries to dress younger.
Rating: 45
Humor: 10
Writing: 15
Acting: 10
Story Concept: 10
Category: Average
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